It has recently come to my attention that pot sellers in the Bay Area are unionizing. Apparently they working conditions which involve the selling of pot to "patience" has become intolerable, what with all the Grateful Dead music and cheese ball stains on everything. As you are no doubt aware, when things get intolerable like this a union must come in and make it all better.
Therefore I propose the creation of Moms Local 1, because frankly our working and living conditions have become intolerable. We are on call 24/7. We get no breaks. We pee and shower in company of others, and sometimes those others are members of the opposite sex(clearly some form of sexual harassment). We do laundry for days at a time only to have to start again as soon as we finished. We drive hither and yon to fetch and deposit children. We are work like dogs on Memorial Day, Fourth of July, Labor Day to get those fabulous grill-tastic feasts off the ground. Do you even want to know what mom does for Thanksgiving and Christmas? Guess what, it does not involve watching football and keeping an eye on the kids (by keeping an eye on I mean only responding to blood curdling screams or actual blood). We ensure that everyone is fed, clothed and basically alive on an on going basis. Some of use it with little to no help and all we get is one day, Mother's Day. Yup, bad buffets and poorly cooked eggs, that is a mom's fate.
My fellow Moms, we must unionize. We need breaks. We need vacations. We need to poo alone! We need to fucking get paid! Join me. Rallies to be forming soon. Sometime between school drop off and the afternoon nap.
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2 comments:
Excellent.
Also, please request that rally organizers provide babysitters. I can't protest properly if I'm holding a straw cup in one hand. At least not if it's only filled with apple juice.
What timing. I literally just had the "you complain about not getting a day off for a year, try three." My son is three, my husband has come home every night and vegged. The days I'm supposed to get off, like this Sunday, he falls asleep 10 minutes into taking his turn with our son.
I agree. It's time to form a union! WE NEED IT!!!!
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